so many things on my mind. composing essays in the shower (the only quiet place these days) but no follow-through.
i’ve been here before. time comes around in stages.
without the writing or sewing or time to otherwise be creative i feel at a loss. something is missing.
it’s the paradox of motherhood really. finding a way to be whole while putting the needs of others before my own.
i do have my camera though. and i’m thankful for what it helps me do.
i find myself looking more closely at everything around me and composing shots in the most mundane of places.
little bits of beauty mixed into a day in the life.
i’ll be back when i can.
{ 19 comments… read them below or add one }
I love your little bits of beauty.
It is important to take time for you, we’ll all be here when you’re back.
I LOVE the photographs you take! So inspiring!
I’m on the side of life that affords me more time. My kids are gone, to their own homes. It’s hard to remember the days that were so demanding you couldn’t even use the bathroom without audience. I can tell you this, the solitude is nice, quiet, boring, as busy as you want but not more, you control and direct the time. You will look back, with longing, at these days you are in now. You will miss the sweetness of those days. Don’t think I don’t remember the frustrations, I do. But mostly I remember what I miss.
I had to laugh when I read Marty’s comment above. Yesterday was one of those days when I couldn’t even go to the bathroom without someone trying to follow me in there. I said to my husband last night that I was going to change my name, because the kids had been, “Mom! Mom! Mom!” all afternoon.
Hang in there, we’re all muddling through with you! See you when you can come up for air.
Do what makes you happy. Try to do something that makes you happy once a day, even if the feeling is fleeting. It is better than having not felt it at all.
I totally get this. The paradox we face. Thank goodness for it all.
To be there for others you need to be there for yourself. Please don’t put yourself on hold, but take time for yourself. Hugs!
It sure is a juggle and I hope you find your ‘zen’ place soon. Loving your images x
Wow, this post says so much and really hit home for me. I’m glad you are seeing the beauty in what’s around you, even if you aren’t getting the time to write or sew. One day at a time, one day at a time…
Nicely put. I look forward to your return, but for now take your time and make the moments last.
There is so much truth here. Beautifully written. And just what I needed to read today. Thank you for that.
I really do feel the ebb and flow of creativity and time. I love your photographs–and that photography challenges (me, you, us all) to find beauty in various places. I’m hoping that you find those moments you need for creative time. I’ll be here when you return
I had to laugh at Marty’s comment too – the first thing I thought when I read your post was ‘I wish I could use the bathroom in peace, just once in a while’. I guess I’ll miss it when they leave?
Have a lovely break.
ps Your photographs are always so beautiful, Amy. They look spontaneous but perfectly constructed.
This is a reply to Meg Evan’s comment, who happened to be commenting on Marty’s comment. We’re just a big circle here, aren’t we?
Anyway, in response to the name changing thing, a dear friend of mine had gotten tired of hearing the “mom” thing one day (why is it never said in a loving way?). She stated that she did not want to hear “mom” one more time, grabbed a magazine, turn on her heel, and while walking up the stairs said, “if you need me you can call me…Coco!”
We still sometimes call her Coco.
Thanks for the post. Illuminating the paradox that many of us feel with words and pictures. Being able to feel the comaraderie of others and knowing that we will miss even this when it’s gone is good.
Paradox of motherhood… boy, did you say it sister! Oh yes, it is.
i’m so glad you commented on my blog (it’s really the only way i find people these days). i find your thoughts so similar to mine, it feels like you’ve plucked them out of my head. tho’ these days, it’s opposite for me, i can find all kinds of things to write about, but am low on inspiration on the photo front. but these things do come in cycles. and this too shall pass.
wow. did you hit the nail on the head with this post.
“time comes around in stages” is such a lovely way to put it, and a gentle reminder.
I do that… take picture with an imaginary camera in my head when there’s no way to take the real thing. When life takes over, when I’m needed by others all the time…
It keeps me sane.