I wrote this last December 31st and it still rings true with me this year.
While considering for a moment what I might resolve for the coming year it occurred to me that such resolutions often seem to serve only one purpose: to remind me of my failures over the past twelve months. So tonight, on this last night of the year, I’m going to look back. I have a dangerous habit to go quickly to my shortcomings and examine only my inadequacies. This evening I’m going to celebrate my successes.
A gift of confirmation to myself.
So I’ve decided to make it a tradition and am inviting you to do the same. Take some time to compile a list of your accomplishments over the past twelve months. If you care to make them public you can do so here, or add your link in the comments and I’ll come celebrate with you. Even during these rough times I’m confident you’ll find yourself pleased if you take the time to pat yourself on the back for the things you did well instead of focusing on the things you need to do better (there will be time enough for that later).
This year I:
mothered two active boys, every day;
did something that scared me;
took care of myself;
dealt with unpleasant situations and survived;
followed through better than ever before;
felt good in my skin (more days than not);
nurtured old friendships and made new ones;
was not depressed.
When I look at it that way, it feels like a pretty successful year overall—thank you for being a part of it and here’s to more to come for all of us.
I light the candles for the generations gone
the blessings tie me to them.
I feel their blood in my veins.
I am a child in my parents’ home. Protected.
I understand the tradition
It’s who I am.
I give it to mine and hope they feel
When I was young I learned the rituals and practiced them because I should.
I do it now because I must.
I ache for the past and pray for the future.
I sing the blessings and light the candles
and I belong.
This was the present I was most excited to give this year.
I was torn between wanting him to open it on the first night or waiting for the last night. Or maybe his birthday (which falls the night after Hanukkah ends).
But Quinn decided on last night for me. He grabbed the package from the closet and said ‘For you Daddy!’ There was no turning back.
If you’ve been visiting here for a while you’ll know the saga of My Husband’s Mistress. It’s over now—we closed on the sale in September. It was such an ordeal that we almost weren’t sad to see it go.
And now with a Christmas trip to his family looming and no place of our own to stay, well, there’s a void.
So when Niall opened this last night and was pouring over it and Jake said ‘It’s a little bittersweet, huh, Nye?’ to say that I had a lump in my throat would be an understatement.
I ordered it through Apple and think the printing is really nice. I’m thrilled with the finished product and I think Niall really liked it too.
If you want to see more pictures of The Mistress you can click over here.